Entropy: Living with Pain

Our society has become so complacent that the mere idea of discomfort can cause a panic. By the basic laws of physics and entropy, you start degrading as soon as your first cell is formed. Therefore, your pain began the instant your life began, and will not end until your own physical end occurs. Depressing? Welcome to reality. Life is a cyclic process degrading with entropy. More diseases are developing from old strains, more mutations and imperfections are occurring within each generation, and entropy is running rampant within every system and subsystem on this planet

Some would argue that supercooled superconductors have no entropy, but I would disagree. Superconductors have zero resistance along the line, but not all electrons in the flow participate in superconductivity so there is inherent entropy through those particular constituents. As the temperature of a superconductor decreases, more and more of the electrons transition to a state without entropy. At absolute zero, where T=0Kelvin, there is no entropy whatsoever. This phenomenon, however, further described on page 147 of Entropy And Its Physical Meaning  by J. S. Dugdale, is difficult and considered by some to be impossible due to the difficulties in reaching absolute zero, 0K.

The Kelvin scale is based on the idea that 0K signifies a state where a particle has an average energy of zero, while any higher value signifies a higher average energy. Scientists supposedly achieved negative temperature values on the Kelvin scale- previously considered to be impossible- in early 2013 through use of a quantum gas but were soon questioned. To this day scientists are going back and forth on the issue. As more testing is being done and I don’t know a whole lot about it, I’ll just say that IF the negative Kelvin scale is really going to be a thing, then it will have massive ramifications for dark matter theory as relating to black holes (queue star trek music).

Either way, it’s either impossible or impractically difficult to create a superconductor (at this day and age) that has no entropy. Therefore, I think it’s safe to say that a superconductor’s state of entropy can remain in the middle of a physics and philosophical tug of war.

Getting back on track, the world is going to hell in a hand basket, quite literally. Meanwhile, with the development of our current mainstream lifestyle, the popular lifestyle is one that puts affluence and comfort on a pedestal. Historically speaking, it is only in the past few generations that this philosophy has become as culturally invasive as it is currently. Perhaps 100 years ago, the literature did not display the same neediness for attention, gratification, and luxury as is readily available in more current publications. Aldo Leopold, a late 19^th to early 20^th century environmentalist and philosopher said “the modern dogma is comfort at any cost.” This begs the question: “what is that “cost?”’

Today we have thousands of different medications available to the average, well-off person with or without prescriptions. Of these, prescription pain medication alone may fall into one of the following categories:

·        Nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDS)

·        Corticosteroids

·        Acetaminophen

·        Opiods (Narcotic Analgesics)

·        Muscle Relaxants

·        Anti-Anxiety Drugs

·        Antidepressants

·        Anticonvulsant Drugs

This list (more in depth information here) does not include all prescription pain management drug categories, nor does it account for any nonprescription pain medications such as Acetaminophen, Ibuprofen, and Naproxen. All of this goes to say that we have the means and desire to be without pain.

What could this mean? Our bodies are breaking down. We have medications that can make all that pain just magically go away… but should we?

When I was in high school, I had a horrible swim coach. Long story short, I went from being told that I could go to the Olympics to being a slow, bored swimmer with no hope of getting a scholarship. After moving to Alabama and getting a new, better coach, I felt the clock counting down to graduation. I wanted… no… NEEDED a scholarship to swim in college! I swam with paddles on my arms for the duration of every 2 hour practice for 4 months straight to build up my strength, ran a few miles a week, started doing light weights (with no prior training so it was just basic curls and triceps extension type things), and did a core workout for 30-45 minutes every night before bed. I was ripped, I was strong, and I was ready to start competing again.

I crushed my shoulder. There was so much muscle in my arms from over-training that it exacerbated a preexisting condition, Thoracic Outlet Syndrome. My shoulder bones collapsed into one another as they could not support the sheer weight of the muscle mass in the thoracic region. After months of punching the side of the pool as I tried to swim and just could not move my arm, blacking out from accidentally moving my arm and waking up crying in a heap on the floor, and not being able to find a pulse in either of my arms I was told that I would need surgery. Long story shorter, I have a third of the original muscle in my right side and the doctor put me on Lyrica because there was irreparable nerve damage done during the surgery.

About the same time that I got diagnosed with lupus and fibromyalgia, the subsequent joint swelling became so bad that I could not walk in the mornings. I would intentionally set my alarm for 20 minutes before I actually had to get up so that I could gradually get up without blacking out from pain. My rheumatologist put me on a relatively low dosage of a cytotoxic chemotherapy drug to help with the severe swelling and I was once again able to walk. I was only 20 years old and taking chemotherapy with no perceivable end in sight, not a joyful thought at all.

You might be wondering why this is such a big deal. A little pain medication and chemo and I’m suddenly able to tie my own shoes and walk in the mornings, right? Wrong. Medications cloud your head, make you gain weight, and control your life. I was still expected to perform as though nothing was wrong (if it’s an invisible disease it doesn’t exist, amiright).

After consulting a doctor and nutritionist, I began an extremely restrictive anti-inflammatory diet approximately 9 months ago. I began weightlifting almost a year and a half ago. Due to these things, I noticed that my ability to walk and move without pain increased dramatically and the chronic pain from the lupus and fibromyalgia eased as well. As such, I told my doctor that I wanted off of the chemo and pain medications. Today I am 2 months free from chemo and almost a week free from the Lyrica.  

What’s my point with all of this? I’m in more pain now than I was before refusing to be on the chemo and Lyrica any longer. It’s less comfortable to walk or move my shoulder. This being said, I’m free from the constraints of those horrible things. Since starting to come off of the chemo, I’ve dropped 30 lbs in 3 months. My eyes are no longer dull and lifeless, but are starting to brighten. I’m no longer 10 seconds behind in a conversation, I’m able to keep up in class, and I am starting to feel less like a complete moron. I took control of my situation and accepted that, despite my personal entropy, LIVING my life was worth more to me than being comfortable.

It isn’t easy to wake up early and go running and weight lifting every day. It isn’t easy to prepare every meal from scratch. It isn’t easy to go to other people’s houses or restaurants and not be able to eat a single thing there. What is easy though, for the first time in years, is my smile.

Entropy is everywhere, inescapable, and there are ways to dull that pain. But sometimes, the pain is what makes life worth living. It’s constant. But it’s also a constant reminder of what I’ve overcome. 

0th to 4th Dimension: Mathematics and Philosophy

Mathematical Introduction

If you stick with this I promise there’s a point at the end!

 0-Dimension:

In geometry, the zero-dimension is a point. A point is an infinitesimally small marker of a specific location with no accompanying volume, height, width, or length. It has no external or internal properties aside from its current location. Several zero-dimensional points may be set in series to create a larger object, such as a line or square, but the object is itself, in its most basic form, a zero-dimensional construct.

1-Dimension:

One-dimensional objects are created from an infinite number of zero-dimension points strung together. The resultant is a line segment. This product, as its title’s numeral designation indicates, has but one property: length. Several one-dimensional line segments may be joined to create a greater whole categorized within a higher dimension, but that object will always be able to be broken down into its one and zeroth-dimensional constituent parts.

 

2-Dimension:

Two-dimensional objects are created from a collection of line segments connected such that they create a flat plane. As such, these may also be broken down into an infinite number of zeroth-dimension constituents. As indicated by the title, two-dimensional objects hold two properties, length and width. Several two dimensional objects can be combined to create a higher-dimensional object that can always be broken down into its smaller contributing parts.

3-Dimension:

Three-dimensional objects are made from several two-dimensional planes connected to create a greater whole that has flat planes extending in degrees off of three basic x-y-z planes. More simply, a 3D object is like a collection of flat planes such that it may be picked up rather than being a plane with no thickness. This dimension has three properties, length, width, and height. Although rarely discussed in high school and many collegiate courses, three-dimensional objects may also be combined to create a new product that may be categorized under a higher dimension.

 

SPECIAL CASE: Circle/Sphere with the same dimension (radius)

Circles and spheres are interesting subsets within two and three-dimensional special sets. This is due to the fact that, for these shapes, all of the dimensions are the same. For example, for circles, the length and width dimensions are replaced by a constant radius coming out of a single origin point. For spheres, the length, width, and height dimensions are replaced by a constant radius.

Beyond a circle and spherical ability to combine multiple dimension types into one, spheres may be used to generalize shapes within all dimensions. This is done through application of something called the “N-Sphere.” An n-sphere is a way to describe dimensions using a generic sphere. For example, a 0-sphere is the set of points on the edges of a 1-dimensional line segment. A 1-sphere is the outer shape, or circumference, of a circular, 2-dimensional flat plane. A 2-sphere is the outer shell of a 3-dimensional sphere. As can be interpolated from the above information, any n-sphere can be described as the surface or shell of a (n+1)-dimensional shape. A 4-sphere can also be called a “quaternionic projective line.” In a nutshell, quaternions are a set of numbers that combine real and complex numbers into sets denoted by “H.” A quaternionic projective line, or 4-sphere, is a smooth, topological shell of the complex quaternion set in question.

EG:         H = a*1 + b*i + c*j + d*k where i, j, and k = √1

This is a 4-sphere depiction of a ring of quaternions. For more information on how this was generated through a sphere-stacking study, click here.

For easier notation, any n-sphere with n<3 is called a “hypersphere,” a 3-sphere can be called a “glome,” and a “unit n-sphere” is simply a sphere with a radius of unity (1) and denoted Sⁿ.

Why do we care about n-spheres? As shown above by the hypersphere, glome, and 4-sphere examples, n-spheres are an interesting example of how circles and spheres are not only a unique geometric phenomenon due to their measurements but also can be used to summarize complex, high-dimension objects and ideas into more understandable, workable forms. This also allows for a much simpler way to calculate the volume and surface areas of higher dimension objects, as is shown in the figure below.

 

4-Dimension:

It is interesting to note that, to this point, all of the dimensions have been strictly lengths. The fourth dimension combines the concept of solid three dimensional space with the 4^th dimension, generally considered to be time. This allows for transient (changing with time) analysis. For example, it is through the fourth dimension that changes in position, volume, length, width, etc. can be studied with respect to time. One example of this is the Continuity Navier-Stokes Equation that relates changes in the velocities in x, y, and z defined as u, v, and w with respect to the x, y, and z distance coordinates and changes in time in order to find the properties of continuous motion of a fluid.

Navier Stokes Continuity:               dρ/dt + (d(ρu))/dx + (d(ρv))/dy + (d(ρw))/dz = 0

Philosophical Application:

What is science without art? What is music without wavelengths, amplitude, and frequency? You can’t have one or the other and still be a balanced person, it’s best to learn how to see the science in philosophy and the philosophy in science.

               “What can you possibly pull from a bunch of points, lines, planes, and squiggles?” you might think. While I could sit here and make a billion jokes about thinking outside the three-dimensional polyhedron or some such nonsense, I could also describe a phenomenon that appears quite often in our society today.

A lot of people are content with living day-to-day, in the moment, and are focused on being “happy” with themselves. They simply exist where they are, not moving in a significant manner forward or looking far into the future. This is reminiscent of the zeroth dimension. People like this are perfectly alright with simply existing. For example, they never really put a lot of effort into the mental, physical, or spiritual growth necessary for a well-rounded, healthy person.

There may be somewhat limited expansions and variations on this theme in which people work to some degree, perhaps just getting by in school and work but never truly pushing themselves to the max. These people are reminiscent of the first, second, and/or third dimensions in which there is freedom to move, but still no motion within the time. This limitation shows how people today are not willing to make plans for the future and put in the hours and effort to make their dreams a reality.

People living with a “fourth-dimension” mindset have an understanding that, while life consists of the day-to day living and singular moments, those are simply the smallest components of a greater whole. Much like an atom is the most basic building block of the universe, a moment is the most basic building block of a lifetime. A forward-thinking person will take each moment as an opportunity to advance their future. They will spend their life with the mindset that, were they to die right at that moment, they would not be caught at rest, being lazy, or wasting time. While a person living in a lower-dimension lifestyle might desire a better life and may even work a little to that extent, a person living a fourth-dimension lifestyle will work till their very last breath to ensure the completion of their goals. Much as the mathematic fourth dimension has motion in time, the corresponding people-group will also work over time to make their dreams a reality.

Each day presents unique opportunities that can alter the course of your entire life. A person might choose to be stagnant and live simply for the enjoyments of that day alone, or they can choose to be cognizant and willing to work for those opportunities. Because really. What’s cooler? An “infinitesimally small point with no distinguishable dimension” or a set of many variables moving, adapting, and changing with time? One sounds a lot more fun than the other.

“Neither a wise man nor a brave man lies down on the tracks of history to wait for the train of the future to run over him.” ~Dwight D. Eisenhower

Living with Lupus: Dealing with Morons

               This past semester has been a struggle.  I have been judged by my peers in multiple different ways and multiple situations.  Many times I've considered giving up, leaving, and essentially hiding from everyone that causes me pain and turmoil.  Did I? No.  Was it easy? No.  Why didn't I just quit? Because the opinions of morons and potential limitations I face won’t ever hold sway over my life and how I choose to live it.

               The first notable situation I can recall was at a church choir rehearsal.  I asked for prayers for my health as I was becoming very ill from fibromyalgia and lupus.  After the practice, I was approached by several women who, despite their kind intentions, made scarring remarks.  They told me “You’re too young for lupus,” “Are you SURE it’s lupus,” and my personal favorite: “I know a lady with lupus!!! She died… and it was horribly painful for her and nasty for us to watch!”  HOW DO YOU RESPOND TO THAT?!?!?!  What I wanted to do was tell them that no, I’m not too young, my SPECIALIST is darn sure I have lupus, and that comments like those are why people become Baptist.  What I did say was “Thanks for your prayers” and just walked away. Benjamin Franklin said that “It is ill-manners to silence a fool and cruelty to let him go on.”  There may be no perfect solution to handling a situation like that.

               The second situation that stands out in my mind was when I was in class with a professor. As stated in a previous post, I had a Non-Epileptic Seizure (NES) in that professor’s class.  Approximately a week after the test, I went to him and asked to retake it or have extra credit and was told “No!!! It wouldn’t be fair to the other students.”  After hearing that, I asked “Why?”  He walked away very quickly so I couldn’t keep up with him.  Later that month, that same professor told me that I should drop out of school because I was intentionally killing myself by being in school.  He tried to convince me that it was MY fault that I’m sick and that I was basically committing suicide by being in school… and as such it was my fault that my grades were so low.  What I wanted to do was cry and blow my lid and report him.   What I did was choose to forgive and say “Thank you for your advice sir” and walk away.  Hermant Smarty wrote that “forgiveness doesn’t excuse their behavior.  Forgiveness prevents their behavior from destroying your heart.”  I was traumatized by his treatment of me and it cost me months of health, panic attacks, minor stress-induced seizures, and caused my illness to progress irreparably.  The healing began when I realized that dwelling on stupidity is not worthy of me risking my health and happiness.

               Last but not least, the third situation happened just before my last final in the course taught by the aforementioned professor.  I took that final through testing services by the direction of Disability Services.  As I was sitting in the waiting room with several other disabled students, one turned to me and asked me what was wrong with me.  After that, all of the other students there turned to me with the same question.  They told me that I looked “too normal” and that I didn'tbelong there with them.  They pressed hard and kept asking until I blurted out a random answer.  Some there may not have meant to be cruel… but the remarks from some present hurt.  You see, their disabilities were more visible than mine.  They didn't understand that invisible illnesses can be just as invasive but in a different manner than more visibly noticeable illnesses.  Do I blame them for their questioning? Not really, it’s a common misconception.  Does it still hurt to hear that?  Oh definitely.  Martin Luther King Jr. once said “Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will.”  Invisible illnesses can be alienated and occasionally mocked by people with more obvious problems.  I am blessed to not be marked physically, but it does not lessen the trauma or pain that ensues.

               In summary, people don’t understand what you’re going through and some absolutely don’t care.  The important thing to remember is that it doesn't matter what they think because people like that are wrong.  My family has a saying that “it’s a waste of time to argue with an idiot.  In their mind they’re always right.”  It’s a horrible translation of a segment of Bacchae by Euripides: “Talk sense to a fool, and he calls you foolish” but still accurate.

To those who have family/friends dealing with an invisible disability:

               You won’t understand.  You won’t see what they’re dealing with.  You may never know what to say.  The important thing is to BE THERE.  The day after I was diagnosed with lupus, 80% of my school friends just stopped talking to me.  That percentage includes the guy I was “talking to” at the time.  People are cruel when they don’t understand things and while walking away may seem to be the easiest way to handle disabled friends it is the most heart-wrenching, cruel, hateful thing to do to someone in such a vulnerable state.  Don’t be that guy!

To those dealing with an invisible disability:

Karen Ravn wrote “Only as high as I reach can I grow/Only as far as I seek can I go/ Only as deep as I look can I see/Only as much as I dream can I be.”

               It’s rough.  It’s not impossible.  Don’t let what you’re dealing with today cloud your perception of yourself.  It isn’t your fault and you should never give up.  If people leave you then they aren’t worth it.  The people who remain and accept you for who you are the best, most love-worthy friends.  People will try to beat you down!  Get used to it and work your butt off.  The best feeling ever is when you accomplish something that you were told was impossible for you! Philippians 4:13 says “I can overcome all things through Christ who strengthens me.”  Go overcome. 

When struggling with hardships, I turn to Psalms 11.  In it, David is describing his emotions in response to his son, Adonijah, having declared himself King and stealing his father’s kingdom from him.  The first part of the psalm shows pain, depression, and deep emotional trauma.  The response at the end of the psalm, however, shows the strength given to those who have faith in God and his meaning for our lives.  I leave it to you to read about how David’s life, while riddled with sin, returned to faith in God and was used to build a foundation for Solomon, Judaism, and eventually Jesus Christ Himself. Anyways… contemplate!

 Psalm 11 English Standard Version (ESV)

The Lord Is in His Holy Temple

To the choirmaster. Of David.

11 In the Lord I take refuge;
how can you say to my soul,
    “Flee like a bird to your mountain,
2 for behold, the wicked bend the bow;
    they have fitted their arrow to the string
    to shoot in the dark at the upright in heart;
3 if the foundations are destroyed,
    what can the righteous do?”[a]

4 The Lord is in his holy temple;
    the Lord's throne is in heaven;
    his eyes see, his eyelids test the children of man.
5 The Lord tests the righteous,
    but his soul hates the wicked and the one who loves violence.
6 Let him rain coals on the wicked;
    fire and sulfur and a scorching wind shall be the portion of their cup.
7 For the Lord is righteous;
he loves righteous deeds;
    the upright shall behold his face.